It feels good to be posting again.  I’m super busy these days, but I wanted to share a story on here that is very relevant to getting real success with picking up women.

Like I said, I’ve been busy.  And while I’ve been busy, I had taken on some bad eating habits and stopped going to the gym.  As you can imagine, I gained some weight.

Growing up, I was always a skinny kid.  And I mean skinny – I wanted to put on muscle but I didn’t know how and anything I ate burned to vapor the second it hit my stomach (I know that might sound great to some people, but being a lanky, skinny kid isn’t exactly a picnic either.)

In 2005, I had read up on how to gain a lot of muscle.  And I mean, I went all out – I read tons of information about nutrition, fitness, exercise, etc.  I followed the “bulking” diet to the letter.

I was confident in the reading that I had done and I followed my program religiously.  I ate every meal at the time I was supposed to, I measured out all the food exactly as it should have been and I worked out HARD, just like the program prescribed.

Fact was, I wanted the results of being a bigger, muscular guy, so I was willing to put in the serious time and effort.

How did it work out? Well, Read the rest of this entry »

I sincerely believe the #1 cause of under-achievement and lack of success with women is not approaching or interacting with women enough.

Here are 3 excuses that we all have at least once in our lives which is used for not approaching:

“I don’t know what to say”

“I’m afraid”

“It was the wrong context” (or logistic excuse: she was seated, she was on the phone, a friend came just before I approached, I don’t have the time etc…)

But, I can say for sure that it has NOTHING to do with any of these.

You see, the reason as to why you’re not approaching is simply that you don’t have any INTEGRITY. Yes, no integrity, zero, nada.

I can hear you saying: “But DRH, I’m an honest and moral person and by the way what does it have to do anyway with pick-ups?”

Everything, my friend.

Let me explain. Read the rest of this entry »

What’s Worked For Me

Most girls at rock shows are what I call ‘coat racks’, because they’re holding their boyfriends jacket or whatever. Most of them aren’t really into the band. They are typically NOT worth gaming because they are babysitting for their baggage.

Then there are some girls that are there for the band; some of these girls have bf’s there, some don’t. The bf’s who are there generally aren’t into the band but they make sure they ‘display ownership’ of their female.

There aren’t usually a lot of single girls at metal shows.

There are different methods for different size venues. I’ll start with the small ones.

SMALL VENUES – Attendance 100-500

It’s usually best to go to rock/indie rock shows because band members girlfriends will bring their friends to the show, and they’ll be groups of girls around the venue. They typically go out to smoke a lot (something I hate) but it’s a chance to talk to them without the interruption of shitty music. (I’ve heard hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of local bands in my time.. I actually like less than 5 of them.)

It’s not like night game at a club either, you work the room differently. Make a first pass through and get to know everyone who’s there, figure out who’s single and who’s not, and who’s there with who. Run enough attraction so they want to continue talking but leave on the high point. I never run kino at this point either. Ever.

Sometimes you can connect with a girl if she’s rocking out to the band by pretending to be into them too. I usually leave those moments alone and connect with them again later when we can talk.

After you’ve got a target picked out, run comfort during the set changes, contact close and kino if you’re hitting it off. Don’t go for a kiss or a make out because it makes things weird.

You can only move girls a few places: Bar, in front of stage, table, outside. Sometimes you can move her somewhere to eat close by, but unless she’s been drinking or you have really, really tight game and she’s really really into, you’re not going to be leaving the club with her and you’re better off setting up a Day 2. Bathroom pulls are close to nil because of the size of the place and her friends are 20 feet away from the stall.

MEDIUM VENUES – Attendance = 1000 – 2000

Because of the larger attendanc Read the rest of this entry »

I decided I’m going to start posting again here with some consistency.

Where did I go? What was I doing for the past… hmm… almost 7 months that kept me off of regularly posting here.

Well, as some of you may have noticed, I have had some changes of heart about the concepts that are most prevalent in the seduction / PUA / pick-up artist community. Some of you balked at what I had to say, some of you agreed and some of you said, “Quit whining… If you don’t like it, change it!” And I said I would and I will keep that promise.

Even still, it took me a while to reconcile how I was going to do it. And in many ways, thinking about picking up women or seduction was the furthest thing from my mind.

Since the beginning of the year, I’ve been in a relationship. Not an open relationship. Not a relationship for show or for ego-gratification (like someone to praise me or to role-play some fantasy or to take care of me.) I was in the relationship because I cared deeply for the girl and she cared deeply for me.

We had ups, we had downs, we had things we needed to overcome. Maybe I will get into it at some point here, maybe I won’t.

Point is, during this time I started taking on big projects in other areas of my life. Projects that are meaningful to me and pretty massive in terms of what I am aiming to accomplish.

And when I started to deeply commit to pursuing my projects, I discovered Read the rest of this entry »

Lately I am trying to live by this:

“When things are going there best its time to work harder or your success will slowly fade away.”

It seems over the years that everyone I’ve met has visions and dreams but 50% of them never take action on them.  Then there is  the other 49% that do manage to pull themselves away from the TV and their daily routine but they seem to quit before they reach the finish line.  I say this with a caveat that the  finish line is a loose term becuase once you reach a certain level of success you must put on going effort into it but most people abandon future development.  They settle for good results when, if they pushed just a little father they could achieve greatness.  They shift their believes so they don’t have to follow through on their commitments.  They start to tell themselves stories about why it isn’t for them and go off to invest time into another project which they never finish.

Take this niche that we are in. Self-development geared toward becoming better with women.  Everyone and I mean EVERYONE I’ve been out with or met has achieved some level of results BUT they have all stopped once they are great with out fully pushing themselves to super stardom.  They hit a certain level of success and then they think its over or its handled.  They walk away with out finishing what they started.  Whether it be for something else or becuase they have some internal issues surrounding whats really going on.

I think it takes a special commitment to yourself and to no  one else to reach that next level.  Most people go through different phases in their lives.  They think they want something but then inside they fully never come to terms with it.  They invest years upon years into something and they turn their backs  with out following through.  This is a common thread I see everywhere.

In my opinion it all comes down to internal barriers. Whether it be fear of society excepting you or fear of what your parents might think.   Even worse internal fear of truly actualizing your dreams. Something inside holds you back and then you make up reasons in your mind to shift your attention.  You tell yourselves a story why what you set out to do no longer aligns with your core.

Sure I agree with those who have true value changes but for the most part everyone seems to just get better at telling themselves elaborate stories instead of facing your fear.

I strongly believe that to be truly at piece with yourself you need to conquer your fears.  I don’t think you can ever be fulfilled completely if you don’t.  Turing your back on it only embeds deeper problems that will surface later.   Hell if you set out to do it in the first place it must have been something you wanted.  If you can’t handle the fire you should not have wasted all the time playing in it to begin with. Read the rest of this entry »

I couldn’t come up with a good name for the post, but this is an exchange between me and someone else who’s studied pick-up for a while.  I figure since I took the time to write a response, I might as well share it with everyone here (names/locations changed, and clipped out some details):

Friday night I checked out a piano bar. The piano man was magnificent! He got the whole crowd singing. I was right there, next to the piano, singing my heart out. Along with a half dozen young girls. I estimated that they were either in their late teens (possibly jailbait) or early twenties. In other words, at least thirty years younger than me. I flirted with them during the singing, but did not expect anything to come of it.

During the singing, one of the girls — in my opinion, the most attractive one – Read the rest of this entry »