Becoming a Pickup Artist – A Core-Skills Guide to Game by Pick-Up Evolution
Part 8: Staying in Conversation and Stalking Part A
Legend:
Staying in conversation
One of the first sticking points you may encounter is staying in conversation. Once you learn to open you need to learn how to transition into starting a conversation. The first major pitfall that some people experience is ejecting for no reason. This may come about because you feel that you don’t know what to say next or there was an awkward silence. The more you force yourself to stand there “in set”, the more your brain will begin to come up with things to say. Even if they aren’t so good, the point is that you learn to deal with the social pressure.
Transitioning (Hooking the Conversation)
After opening, you want to get into a normal conversation and this is where you reach the Hook point. For me hooking is all about that point where instead of them wanting to leave, they want you to stay. This can be done in a number of ways, but your goal is to make them want to talk to you.
You can set up a situation where they want to talk to you before you even open. This is the most effective way to Hook the group or you can use one of the techniques listed below.
Stacking
Stacking is a technique where you stop talking about one thing and start talking about a completely different thing. When you’re talking in a bar there really is no transition necessary. You can go from talking about the sky to talking about apples, you don’t need a reason to just talk. A technique known as stacking forward is where you cut the thread (whenever you’re talking about) and just start talking about something else. This allows you to shift the conversation through different topics rapidly till you hit something that the people you’re talking to are interested in and then they will hook.
Edge: Something to consider here is that this does not just apply to choice of conversational topics. Sometimes what you choose as a topic doesn’t really matter as much as how you talk about it and what within that subject you choose to talk about.
For example, once I was talking about something with a group of girls and the conversation wasn’t really going anywhere. At that time, the real problem was that I was just moving my lips and there was no engagement or real interest behind what I was saying. But then I just noticed something in the environment and commented on it in a sarcastic way… it was at that moment that the girls busted up laughing and the whole tone changed. Hooking the conversation didn’t take place in this instance because of a different topic, but because of a different energy.
Just something to keep in mind…
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{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
And to piggy back these guys, one of the easiest ways to generate conversation while you’re in the group is to state something based on a situational observation. This will require you to develop your observational skills so that when something happens in your environment, you’ll have something quick and witty to say.
People love hearing/talking about the obvious. If what you say hooks, then you just earned yourself another 3-4 minutes of conversation.
But if you are stuck with that to say, try your best not to leave the group. Wait for either someone else to say something or just say the first thing that you can think of. Sometimes, what you say may not make sense, but it may evoke a reaction, with can lead to another conversation.
And to piggy back these guys, one of the easiest ways to generate conversation while you’re in the group is to state something based on a situational observation. This will require you to develop your observational skills so that when something happens in your environment, you’ll have something quick and witty to say.
People love hearing/talking about the obvious. If what you say hooks, then you just earned yourself another 3-4 minutes of conversation.
But if you are stuck with that to say, try your best not to leave the group. Wait for either someone else to say something or just say the first thing that you can think of. Sometimes, what you say may not make sense, but it may evoke a reaction, with can lead to another conversation.
This is, in essence what Ive been waiting for. This is an exact description of my problem. I cant count the times Ive bailed out because I was afraid of the coming silence and awkwardness. Next time I will be better prepared…
Great material as always.
This is, in essence what Ive been waiting for. This is an exact description of my problem. I cant count the times Ive bailed out because I was afraid of the coming silence and awkwardness. Next time I will be better prepared…
Great material as always.
Yeah its hard. The way I try to look at everything is if I don’t know what I am doing then I must be learning something. If we are comfortable then we know what to do and aren’t making strides in our progress.
Stick it out for as long as you can and naturally every time you will get better. Not to mention you will build a strong power of being able to deal with social awkwardness.
Keep it up and shoot me an email if you have any questions.
Yeah its hard. The way I try to look at everything is if I don’t know what I am doing then I must be learning something. If we are comfortable then we know what to do and aren’t making strides in our progress.
Stick it out for as long as you can and naturally every time you will get better. Not to mention you will build a strong power of being able to deal with social awkwardness.
Keep it up and shoot me an email if you have any questions.