Getting Started in Pick-Up Guide – Part 3: Creating Confidence Part B

Becoming a Pickup Artist – A Core Skills Guide by Pick-Up Evolution Part 3: How to get Good Part B

This is all about Creating Confidence and Becoming Competent

The number one thing that women want is a confident man. This leads us to the question of how do we become confident with women. It is not rocket science, but it will take time.

Being confident is all about being comfortable in any situation and knowing what to do. This really comes down to practicing enough so that you’ve experienced many things and you automatically do the right thing.

Edge:

I think there are two elements to cultivate here.

One is worldliness – exposing yourself to as many different things, situations, circumstances, places and types of people as you can.

Open-mindedness is definitely a plus here.

The other is your ability to handle different situations and circumstances. I have found the best way to get good at this is to:

1) experience a lot of situations, even if they may be uncomfortable, foreign or scary to you at first, 2) stay in the present moment – don’t retreat into your mind, don’t judge things, don’t think about the past, don’t think about the future and stop trying to analyze, strategize and mentally pigeonhole everything. Let new experiences wash over you and remember that every new experience is one step towards mastery.

There are unpleasant things that I can handle much better now since I’ve experienced them a bunch of times and I’ve learned to deal with them with composure and presence of mind.

Being rejected is hard. Breaking up with someone you love is hard.  Approaching women when you’re afraid to approach is hard. But it all gets easier as you handle it, learn from it and then mentally “release” the experience (that is, let go of it and not ruminate on it.)

Legend:

Let’s relate this to something that we can all understand: Driving a car.

Almost everyone can relate to driving a car. Think back to when you just started learning to drive.

It was extremely scary and you probably had trouble backing up out of the driveway let alone even being able to look in your mirror while signaling.

After practicing for days in the parking lot, you are then comfortable enough to take it to the side streets. The highway still scared the crap you.  Maybe after a year of solid practice you didn’t have to think about doing everything anymore. Instead, it became natural to merge onto the highway at high speeds or use your turn signals without thinking about it.

This is how we have to be in order to be good with women. Slowly we have to progressively desensitize ourselves to being around women and being in different situations with them until we are comfortable and all the skills that you’re going to learn come out naturally.

This is an experimental process. Don’t expect an overnight transformation, but if you practice you will get good.

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Tagged as: confidence, creating confidence, Pick-up Guide