One acronym that pick-up artists use is IOIs or “indicators of interest“. An IOI could be anything from a woman smiling at you to her scratching the top of her hand or playing with her hair. I could list a bunch of IOIs here, but I’m not going to.
Why? I am not going to list them here because I believe paying attention to IOIs is the wrong place to be focusing.
The only IOI that I paying attention to is: Is she still here or did she disappear?
Now this may sound extreme, but it’s true. Women know how to fake IOIs. They also know how to fake IODs (Indicators of Disinterest) to see how you’ll react. Being that you can’t always trust IOIs or IODs, it is best to not rate your interactions based on how many signs you’re getting one way or another, but rather by the end result.
Story: I was once hooking up with this really hot girl who has a tendency to be really hot or cold with me. In fact, I was trying my best to be cool and genuine to her while still escalating the interaction physically. Meanwhile, she was rolling her eyes and saying I was full of shit and making disgusted faces at me like I was a piece of shit.
But when I looked closer, I noticed that everytime I escalated the interaction physically a little bit, her pupils would get really big. Psychology has shown us that dilated pupils are a sign of experiencing pleasure – so despite all of her disgusted looks and eye rolling, she actually was getting quite turned on. If I had been looking at the traditional indicators of disinterest to see how I was doing, I would have thought I was doing quite poorly.
So you may say, “OK, then the lesson here is look for pupil dilation and then you’re set.”
Sure, but that’s not easy in a dark club or in most environments when you’re not extremely close to the other person.
So then what would I recommend as the focus instead of IOIs? I have had the best success when I unwaveringly believe that everything I am doing is massively arousing to her and she is getting quite turned on by me. When I take on that unwavering belief and shut out any input to the contrary, I always do better than when I am judging my interaction based on her responses. In holding my belief and following it without compromise, I am leading the interaction. If I let her facial expressions and body movements control my actions, she is leading the interaction.
To tie it all up: If she’s still standing there, she’s interested (or at least, interested enough.)
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Great insight! I’ve honestly never thought about it like that.
Actually I feel this..The times when I focused on the interaction as a whole, and had the mindset of “she is actually getting aroused by our interaction” instead of always looking out for her IOI`s and IOD`s and judge by that.
Keep it up guys!
Thanks guys.
Like I always say the only IOI I ever look for is if she is talking to me or if she is walking away.
I just assume its on.
Thanks guys.
Like I always say the only IOI I ever look for is if she is talking to me or if she is walking away.
I just assume its on.
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